Day Six! Down nine pounds this morning!!! In just five days. I am so happy about this. I know it's because I'm not doing carbs and sugar. Both of those are just slides to hell for me. If I don't have any carbs at all or any sugar at all I don't have to play the game of how much? how many? So I'm eating six small meals of veggies, fruit and proteins and I feel great. Today: watermelon, nuts, turkey, snap peas, mushrooms, more watermelon and i'm about to go out to the kitchen and have another little small meal which I'm calling my mini-feasts! I take the time to put the food on a really pretty china plate and have a glass of water in a really pretty glass. I think that this little bits of being kind to me are helping me, too. When I fuss over myself with a nice place setting, I'm telling myself that I'm worth it. And I am. This new plan is exactly the jump start I needed to get me going again. To take me through the last half of the hundred pounds I need to lose.

Down another 1/2 pound - so 6.5 pounds in just four days. (Today's day five but the weigh in was this morning ) So today I had fruit and peppers and some left over chicken, then blueberries and nuts, then peppers and nuts, then a beautiful dish full of deli turkey, snap peas, cherry tomatos and mushrooms. I put a little lite salad dressing on it and zapped it in the microwave. Yum. And strawberries for my last snack. Another too-tight skirt zipped right up today - proof that 6.5 small pounds truly do make an impact. If you think about what six pounds of meat looks like - that's an impressive loss. So I'm back on track, back on the plan, back to the losing streak. And in this particular situation I'm proud to be a loser.
I was in a meeting today at work with people that I had not met before. One of the women is obese - and when I looked around the room I realized she was the only truly heavy person in the room. And I wondered how much of her time she spends thinking about her weight. I sure spend a lot of my time thinking about mine, and I am well on my way to my goal of losing 100 pounds. (more than half way there!) So did she compare herself to the other people in the room? Or is she ok with it? Tough to be ok with it when we are surrounded by and constantly bombarded by advertising that depicts woman as very thin - and then that becomes the standard. But I don't think that those images are my driving force - I think recovering my health is my driving force. And I feel great. I'm still thinking about her tonight - wondering what her demons are - wondering what emotions she is stuffing - wondering why she needs to medicate herself with food.

Down another pound! Six pounds in three days! And had a great day today for Day Four. Veggie omelet, watermelon, nuts, shrimp, salad. Lots of water. Nice long walk. Put on a skirt today that was feeling too tight last week - and today it zipped right up. Starting to feel really good - I-can-do-this-good. My body feels like it's working the right way - with itself instead of against itself. When I fill it full of junk - sugary junk - everything slows down. My metabolism, my digestive system, my energy. When I fill it with the right stuff, my engine starts running. And I accomplish more. I am having some emotional stuff - and have to remember to breathe and feel the feeling because it is so easy for the old pattern of comforting myself with food to return. Which of course was never and will never be a true comfort. The hardest one for me to deal with is anger - and I'll just have to be more aware of allowing anger to be displayed without stuffing food on top of it. I have to keep reminding myself that I won't get 'in trouble' for being angry. It's ok to let it out.  
Happy Birthday to me in 75 days!

Another great day. Weighed in - two pounds down. That's 5.5 in two days. I know it won't keep up like that, but it sure feels good. Rewarding. Had a veggie omelet - no toast - for breakfast. Fruit for lunch - blueberries and apple slices. And salad and chicken for dinner. Nuts for a snack. Great day. No exercise today but had company all day. I'm sure if I had tried hard enough I could have fit it in - after they left, I guess. But I didn't. And no guilt about that. The no alcohol thing is working great - not a problem at all. I'm having just as much fun without as with. And think of the calories I'm saving.
I'm sitting here tonight at the end of a great day and feeling wonderful because I'm eating right. So simple - with such a huge positive impact. If it's all so great, why did it take me solong to get here? And, even more worrisome - can I stay here? The answer has to be yes.