Hey - 217 today! One little pound away from half way to my goal. So glad I stayed with the program during that looooong plateau. Beautiful day here in upstate New York. Sunny and warm - 60's. I have one of those lovely days with not a lot of have-tos in it so I can plop a lot of want-tos into it. ONe of those will be the long bike ride I have planned for right after I finish this post. But the other want to was just accomplished - I parked my car in the sun in the driveway and cleaned it out from top to bottom. You won't believe what I discovered. Here's the list: a half of a water bottle stuck in the mechanism under the seat (or why the seat wouldn't slide back and forth anymore) soda bottle caps by the dozens, french fries (how I ever let those escape from the destination of my mouth - and hips and butt - I'll never know) a McDonald's smushed up bag with I can't imagine what inside of it - didn't look - coins and coins and more coins from all those visits to the drive thru to buy those french fries and I was so eager to shove them in my mouth six and seven at a time that the change from paying for the food got tossed in the direction of the cup holder but many coins landed on the floor. Straw papers, napkins, flakes of sugar coating from the many many donuts I ate in that car, finger prints, smudges, sticky stuff.  An eater's car. When you binge, the car is the perfect place to do it. You're alone, closed in and moving so that no one sees you for very long. Or you can take your car and park it in the lonely corner of a parking lot facing away from everything and go to town on your icecreamcookiescakecandydonutsfries. It's ironic that bingers often eat out of loneliness but the act of eating all that stuff alone in your car or your kitchen or your living room creates more lonliness. A viscious cycle. And one that I joyfully no longer take part in. I haven't eaten in my car since my last go round with sugar - (and obviously hadn't cleaned my car either.)  But it's brand spankingly clean now and will stay that way because I am no longer a car eater. I think because I have organized my eating and taken the chaos out of my life - the drama of where and when and how will I get my food, hide my food, eat my food - that I am now able to organize other parts of my life. Like the inside of my car. How fun it will be the next time I go someplace, to get in my clean car and know that food will never be the reason it gets messy again.  
Great news and reward time - my size 16 jeans go on, zip up and I can still breathe!!!! So the 18's are now in the donate bin along with the black coat I wore trying to be invisible. The size 16 coat? A very happy spring green. Sometimes worn with a beautiful purple scarf. No more hiding, no more invisibility, no more binging. Yippee!